I don’t need you.

cherished-property:

I can handle myself. My life is stressful at times, with competing obligations and never enough time to fulfill them. But I put on my armor, and I do what needs to be done. I kick ass at work. I take charge at home. I am a single mother with multiple degrees who has rebuilt my life from scratch while maintaining a successful career. I don’t need you.

But at the end of the day, it’s hard to find my sanctuary. I still feel ready for battle. I still feel the tension in my shoulders. My brain runs a million miles a minute, ever-vigilant for the next problem to attack. I may be on the ropes some days, but I always keep my gloves up. I’m always ready. Even when I don’t want to be.

I can handle the fight, but I am better when you take it from me. I am better when you remind me that I don’t have to keep my guard up. I don’t have to take control and make decisions. I don’t have to watch out for the next problem on the horizon. You’ve got that. And you’ve got me.

I can quiet my mind and focus on the one thing that fulfills me most: serving you. This is my sanctuary. This is where I can let go and know that I am protected and cared for. This is where I recharge. All couples love and support one another during the busy, stressful times. We just do it a little differently. We do it with your collar around my neck. We do it with your paddle against my ass until the tears flow freely. We do it with rules and permission and denial. This is how I feel loved and how I give love in return. I crave these displays of ownership and opportunities to serve. I don’t need a break at the end of a hard day; I need a hand in my hair reminding me where I belong—that I do belong. Cherished property.

No, I don’t need you to solve my problems and fix my life. I can do that for myself. But I am better with you. Better with your guidance, your support, and your hand gripping the leash. I manage on my own, but I thrive under the control of the one who owns me.